Finding that center of gravity

Humans, at the same time, play multiple characters at once. They hold multiple positions at the same time… You can be oppressed & yet be the oppressor at once. And for that reason, I have learned that perhaps life is all about finding that balance, that center of gravity within yourself so that all your roles, duties are balanced, and none is suffering because of the other… Yet, we get so carried away, or perhaps at times, intimidated by a certain character of ourselves that we don’t realize how much others are suffering, and sometimes the ones suffering were in fact the ones that needed to be treasured more…

Congratulations, you are born, with a wail of cry you enter the world, you haven’t even opened your eyes yet and still you are entitled of so many positions in life, so many relations awaited for you to own them.  You are born, and you are a son/daughter, a sister/brother, a believer/nonbeliever, a niece/nephew, a grandson/granddaughter, and so on.  You haven’t learn to say a word, and perhaps you are even entitled as an uncle/aunt or perhaps granduncle/grandaunt.  Then as you grow, you keep adding to your titles, you keep adding your social circle, and your responsibilities.  It never stops, and continues until you die.

Today, I finally felt motivated to write about it while talking to a dear one.  I loved the gesture they did; they acted and took care of the responsibilities that one of their titles brought along them, and yet, one of their other relation suffered and they seemed completely oblivious to it.  It made me respect and yet disrespect them, both at once and I realized that is the case with all of us.  It includes me, you, them…  everyone!

You are either a believer or you are not, and this means that you either have an additional responsibility or not.  If you are a believer, then along with the worldly relations, you have to satisfy your Creator too and if you are not, then perhaps just focus on worldly relations.

Being a Muslim, at least for me, it all revolves around my religion, each of them holds their significance and makes me fulfill my certain duties towards them.  And yet, at times it is not easy.  In order to satisfy one relation, I end up being unjust to the other.  But what I have learned is that Islam makes it easy to balance them by telling us the priorities, and once we start balancing according to that list, it becomes comparatively easier to balance them, if not 100%.

However, if you are not a believer, then perhaps you can be unjust to either while being perfect for one of them.  But then, I have realized that eventually it makes you suffer more than the relation or the person on the other hand.  Because try as we might, we can never live with just one relation in world.  Even being an introvert makes you crave for relations, perhaps limited ones.

I don’t have any solution, but I do know that in order to have harmony in life, one does need to learn to balance relations.  Just because you got married, doesn’t mean your spouse is the only one who deserves your 100% dedication, and while it does to an extent, still it shouldn’t be on the expense of your duties towards your parents.  Or just because you are now blessed with a child, doesn’t mean you overlook your duties to your spouse.  And while you are balancing them all, doesn’t mean you completely ignore the friend who helped you through the ups and downs of life.  And while you are balancing them, don’t at all forget yourself, and your Creator (if you are a believer).

In the end, best of luck finding that balance, that harmony!  Because I still am trying to balance it all.



…Do not say, “You are not a believer”…

Assalam-0-alaikum …
So i was just killing time in a productive way… Well, trying to have my sleep back… And yet not too fresh to read Al-Quran so was finally reading the book, “The beautiful commands of Allah” compiled by Ruqqiyyah Waris Maqsood … A book that contains common commands of Allah as mentioned in the Holy Quran … & i’d suggest you all to have a copy of it!!!

Anyway, getting back to the topic… So, as i was reading it… I came across the following command… And considering it supports what I have been trying to make people around me understand, therefore, here i am, writing/sharing my views in light of the translation of the Ayah 94 of Chapter 4, An-Nisa, which are….:


there is slight difference of words used in translation as per book & by’s App.. so here is the App’s translation too:


…. That being said, I’ll now simply state my point… Although, what I understand from this Ayah, by the use of “abroad” or “go out” is where Muslims are mainly amongst Non-muslims & hence they should avoid saying them that… For you never know, Allah might change their hearts, indeed, for He has changed hearts of many already…. We, me & you, might be born in a Muslim family … But that doesnt give us the right to feel superior than other…

An important point, before you read further, please know what I understand when it is asked that who is a Believer??
A/c to me, a person who believes in oneness of God… Who bears witness that there is no god but Allah subhan wa taala… & hence, perhaps all believers may not be Muslims, but all Muslims will be believers…
This statement by me maybe subject to criticism by many… But like, i said, it is what i have understood so far… Based on how Allah has mentioned momin (one who is at the highest degree of faith, aamano (those who believe), and muslimoon (Muslims)…. Now, i can be wrong… And I am open for correction/criticism, as long as you are going to be polite, else you can keep your critics to yourself and I will simply ask Allah to correct me if I am wrong, as always.

Now, as a young Muslimah, still trying to attain maturity in terms of belief, right path, and as a practicing Muslim … All i know so far is that a believer should never judge the other person esp. when it comes to religion for it is the matter b/w the person and his God… There are many who convert to islam but fail to show it otherwise b/c they are afraid of something but still they are a believer… Many who appear to be sinful but in fact, their hearts are more clean than yours…

And unfortunately nowadays… It is not just about muslim & non-muslim but amongst muslims too… The sects … Each calling the other, Kafir, non-believer… How?  Why?  For what?? … Yes i know, even the sect i belong too
… The people of same sect say that i am being very modern or liberal and making my own rules… But seriously …

Dont we do what the people of Israel did?  They say that only jews shall go to heaven and any non-jewish shall be dweller of hell … On which, it was asked to them if they had a revelation by God Himself, assuring them that they are right?  That God had made a promise to them??? … And what do we, as belongers of a sect in Islam???  Of all the sects, the two famous sects, sunni & shia… Although, hugging eachother on media… They call each other Kafirs… And all i have left to ask is, have either or both of sects been assured by Allah that they are going to heaven???

For me, i don’t think so… At least I don’t have time judging who is a believer and who is not… Because
a)  i dont know what is in their heart or mind….
b)  I am too busy trying to worry about whether I will be forgiven and granted Jannah (heaven) or not… And always praying for Allah to show me sirat-al-mustaqeem, the right path …to my family, relatives, friends, neighbors etc….

So yes… Now that even Allah has mentioned it in the Quran, will people… esp.on social media, still call each other Kafir?  Be it your own Muslim brother from another sect … And also, to Hindus & jews & christians etc that you meet on twitter, facebook etc??
And before you judge someone, ask yourself are you being right to judge someone’s faith??  arent you being arrogant & proud by judging them just b/c u r a Muslim??  Are you sure that you will be forgiven and sent to heaven??  & what proof do you have?  Are you willing to loose the good deeds you have just so you judge someone else, who may, if Allah wills, becomes one of those who is loved by Allah only b/c you judged him, and yet you are sent to hell??? ….

Think before you call someone a Kafir, non-believer, or a hypocrite in terms of religion… Even if it is someone from another sect of Islam… If you do think they are Kafir, pray to Allah to show them the right path… Because that is what, i believe, the last & most beloved Prophet S.A.W.W did … Prayed for non-believers, that Allah show them the right path…

May Allah show us the right path and help us all walk on it… Aameen…