Where do I belong?


It would seem rather a stupid question to ask… from strangers… or known…  but still, asking… Where do I belong?  … It seems like most of my views are those that fit in with history but not current situations… Though, almost 28… I’m still too young to be part of quite old history and yet, growing up with all these people from my generation and well slightly older than me, I still fail to agree with them on where it counts the most… Esp. when it comes to live life the better way, the solutions of problems… I’m born in a Muslim family, Alhumdulillah… live in a Muslim neighborhood, went to schools, can’t say Muslim as it doesn’t characterize, I mean is the subject of Islamiat enough to call it a Muslim school?  Lets be realistic, even convent schools in Pakistan teach Islamiat… So moving on, I’m surrounded by 99.5% Muslims in my day-to-day life… Yet, sometimes I feel that either I’m wrong or everyone else is…

Not intending to offend anyone… but honestly … after reading something from someone I thought would have similar views as me, I just felt a bit of shock… And so, here I am… wondering where I belong… You see, there are cases where people don’t follow the basic Islamic laws… I don’t too… Yes, I don’t follow them 100%… But I don’t pull someone back from following it, or if they have an opinion that is based completely on Islamic point of view, then I appreciate it and pray that Allah guides me to follow it too… Whereas, when it comes to me, I mostly get an opposing reaction and that too from almost everyone who comes to know about it… There first reaction is:  “Why don’t you abstain from other things as well?” … Where “other things” are the things that are done by me and them as well and it happens when I decide to abstain from something that I haven’t done and intend not to do either but is something that they are doing … and hence when they find out my views, they oppose me… Honestly, why?

Why can’t we appreciate it when someone is taking the right step and encourage them instead of pulling them back?  making them feel isolated and make them feel like they are doing a crime by doing the right thing?  Why is it so hard?  Why… Why… Why… and so many other whys…

I feel like being stuck…stuck among people who talk about Islam but don’t follow it… and who pull back those who try to follow it… And then I feel like I’m someone from another time… Like I don’t belong here… Like something is wrong with me… and more with my heart and mind who don’t digest what people around me say… that my heart keeps feeling guilty until I end up doing the right thing… it must be on the wrong side… or I must be wrong… And perhaps I am… For in today’s time, being right is wrong… being enslaved to Creator is wrong… That’s what this society teaches me… the people, the “well-wishers” … And it feels like I will be walking this path alone … all the way… as long as HE is in my heart… I mean… the fact that I have managed to take all the hateful tone in comments of people I care about, just because I refuse to do something “worldly” … I guess it’s a proof… I must be right… that’s why I’m content?  Or I believe too much in the hereafter that the pain here seems to become because of the thought of doing right for sake of hereafter? … Either way… Being the sinner I was, and to an extent still am… I’ll simply quote the song “Numb” by “Linkin Park” … or maybe end by completely like “Unforgiven” by Metallica… b/c that’s exactly how I feel when it gets too much…  followed by “What do I have but negativity ’Cause I can’t justify the way, everyone is looking at me”  – Somewhere I belong – Linkin Park …. Yes, I’m a sinner… I have listened to songs… and I still do… And you’ll say that Songs are haram too… Yes I know… And that is the reason that since I can no longer erase my memory, these lyrics have stayed in my mind… But I try to avoid as much as I can… Do you????

You’re only allowed to judge me 100% when you yourself are 100% pious and know me 100%… If either if these two qualities are less than 100%, then my dear friend, you should be praying to Allah to show us the right path instead of accusing me just because you’re corrupt yourself…

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…Do not say, “You are not a believer”…


Assalam-0-alaikum …
So i was just killing time in a productive way… Well, trying to have my sleep back… And yet not too fresh to read Al-Quran so was finally reading the book, “The beautiful commands of Allah” compiled by Ruqqiyyah Waris Maqsood … A book that contains common commands of Allah as mentioned in the Holy Quran … & i’d suggest you all to have a copy of it!!!

Anyway, getting back to the topic… So, as i was reading it… I came across the following command… And considering it supports what I have been trying to make people around me understand, therefore, here i am, writing/sharing my views in light of the translation of the Ayah 94 of Chapter 4, An-Nisa, which are….:

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there is slight difference of words used in translation as per book & by Quran.com’s App.. so here is the App’s translation too:

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…. That being said, I’ll now simply state my point… Although, what I understand from this Ayah, by the use of “abroad” or “go out” is where Muslims are mainly amongst Non-muslims & hence they should avoid saying them that… For you never know, Allah might change their hearts, indeed, for He has changed hearts of many already…. We, me & you, might be born in a Muslim family … But that doesnt give us the right to feel superior than other…

An important point, before you read further, please know what I understand when it is asked that who is a Believer??
A/c to me, a person who believes in oneness of God… Who bears witness that there is no god but Allah subhan wa taala… & hence, perhaps all believers may not be Muslims, but all Muslims will be believers…
This statement by me maybe subject to criticism by many… But like, i said, it is what i have understood so far… Based on how Allah has mentioned momin (one who is at the highest degree of faith, aamano (those who believe), and muslimoon (Muslims)…. Now, i can be wrong… And I am open for correction/criticism, as long as you are going to be polite, else you can keep your critics to yourself and I will simply ask Allah to correct me if I am wrong, as always.

Now, as a young Muslimah, still trying to attain maturity in terms of belief, right path, and as a practicing Muslim … All i know so far is that a believer should never judge the other person esp. when it comes to religion for it is the matter b/w the person and his God… There are many who convert to islam but fail to show it otherwise b/c they are afraid of something but still they are a believer… Many who appear to be sinful but in fact, their hearts are more clean than yours…

And unfortunately nowadays… It is not just about muslim & non-muslim but amongst muslims too… The sects … Each calling the other, Kafir, non-believer… How?  Why?  For what?? … Yes i know, even the sect i belong too
… The people of same sect say that i am being very modern or liberal and making my own rules… But seriously …

Dont we do what the people of Israel did?  They say that only jews shall go to heaven and any non-jewish shall be dweller of hell … On which, it was asked to them if they had a revelation by God Himself, assuring them that they are right?  That God had made a promise to them??? … And what do we, as belongers of a sect in Islam???  Of all the sects, the two famous sects, sunni & shia… Although, hugging eachother on media… They call each other Kafirs… And all i have left to ask is, have either or both of sects been assured by Allah that they are going to heaven???

For me, i don’t think so… At least I don’t have time judging who is a believer and who is not… Because
a)  i dont know what is in their heart or mind….
b)  I am too busy trying to worry about whether I will be forgiven and granted Jannah (heaven) or not… And always praying for Allah to show me sirat-al-mustaqeem, the right path …to my family, relatives, friends, neighbors etc….

So yes… Now that even Allah has mentioned it in the Quran, will people… esp.on social media, still call each other Kafir?  Be it your own Muslim brother from another sect … And also, to Hindus & jews & christians etc that you meet on twitter, facebook etc??
And before you judge someone, ask yourself are you being right to judge someone’s faith??  arent you being arrogant & proud by judging them just b/c u r a Muslim??  Are you sure that you will be forgiven and sent to heaven??  & what proof do you have?  Are you willing to loose the good deeds you have just so you judge someone else, who may, if Allah wills, becomes one of those who is loved by Allah only b/c you judged him, and yet you are sent to hell??? ….

Think before you call someone a Kafir, non-believer, or a hypocrite in terms of religion… Even if it is someone from another sect of Islam… If you do think they are Kafir, pray to Allah to show them the right path… Because that is what, i believe, the last & most beloved Prophet S.A.W.W did … Prayed for non-believers, that Allah show them the right path…

May Allah show us the right path and help us all walk on it… Aameen…

Allah – mankind – me


When Allah loves someone, He sets him free letting it come to Him when he pleases, letting him love Him back when he wills … Yet, when mankind loves someone, he’s looking on ways to bind him to himself, someway that it won’t go away even if it hurts him, he doesn’t care because he just wants to keep what he loves, with him …

We talk so much about love yet we know so little about it …

Sometimes its hard to say what’s happening is for good or bad, happiness or pain … Whether Allah is testing you, punishing you or simply blessing you but bringing a hardship in front of you …

I don’t know whether the heart turns numb from going through so many obstacles or simply faith becomes so firm that it brings patience to your heart? Faith, belief, hope … There is always a brand new day, a brand new start … Every moment that ends is a moment bringing you closer to Him …

I’m naïve, non-intellect & perhaps wrong too … But I still believe I’m Alhumdulillah blessed with great gifts …the gift of doing sabr…the gift of having faith even in toughest situations… The gift of not giving up… And the gift of knowing that everything, everyone will only accompany me till death at most, after that its just me & Him … Sometimes I let myself be carried away by duniya, but I guess as far as I have a reminder in my heart, I’m among the blessed ones who haven’t become deaf, dumb, or blind …

Why let tears fall for people when they don’t care? … There’s a limit to everything, even life … So if life is to end today, why not spend it bringing smiles to those who care?

O my heart, fear not thee
For love is more than what eyes can see
Be faithful, steady, & str0ng
InshAllah, n0thing will g0 wr0ng 🙂
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