Observing the observers

“They tell me how to dress up, how to talk, how to smile, how to laugh & live in style; all because they will be observing & judging my every step, every breath…. but did they forget that have eyes to see and ears to hear too?? for before you started judging me, i started observing you… my time is too precious, my smiles priceless so why should i waste them for the tears you make me weep in night? I was created for a purpose & not just for your amusement and pleasure?

Yes i was born for a reason.. a reason far greater than pleasing the selfish.. I wasn’t made to be a puppet or to be enslaved, I was born to be free, to fly high. To serve mankind for humanity but not for materialism…

No… when you decided to observe me, and judge me and compare… you forgot I am observing you too… so worry not, we’re both safe… before you reject me, I already rejected you…”

Sent from my BlackBerry 10 smartphone.

Reignite or let it off?

And sometimes all you really need is a time out… open your diary of life… re-read the lessons it taught you, relive those moments and tell yourself, “If I could get through that, if this happened then, it can happen again & once again, I can get throught it now!”

Things will happen all through life, often times the repeat like a déjà vu… and sometimes to have a different ending than the last one, you need to go through the lessons again, revise them, and act on them!

That’s it!

Nothing is impossible.

And if you’ve been praying for God to reignite the flame then perhaps this is a sign… If you remember your lessons, you will know that this is when you can either cover the candle with your hands while HE reignites the flame or be ignorant and let it go off again…  choice is yours…

Believe in Karma?

I wait at the bus stop and a couple arrives, both old and shaking but yet they hold each other’s hands, giving the support needed.  My bus arrives and I get on it and as it takes me to my destination, I see many others like them; some with a companion & some alone…  My destination arrives, I start my job and with each passing hour, I see more old people.  Some of them fit as a fiddle, while others suffering from one disease or the other.  They are out to shop with shaky hands and weak legs, almost deaf or almost blind, some diabetics looking for sweets to change flavour of mouth while others who can barely hold or stand, look for something to cook for their guests…  all old, and all on their own.  Very few I find with a partner or a loved one…  and each single one reminds me of my parents… and my future that I fear…  not because old age is bad, but because the way our generations have gradually forgotten to treat old people with love, care, compassion… including many children have forgotten how to take care of their parents… this includes people from my generation…

So yes, I m scared of growing old when I see them.  And I know many people believe in Karma, that if you do good, you get good… and while I believe too, I am also realistic that sometimes bad happens to you not because you did bad, but because the bad doing was meant to be done by the other person while, being a Muslim, for me it was a chance to be patient to earn rewards…

For now, all I know is that when I see old people struggling, my heart bleeds… I pray Allah ease their troubles… Aameen…

Cinnamon Rolls



For the Dough:

  • 2.5 cups All-purpose flour / maida
  • 1 teaspoon active dry yeast…  (or half sachet i.e. 3.5 gm)
  • 1/2 cup milk (lukewarm)
  • 1/6 of a cup or 37.5 gm unsalted butter
  • 1/6 cup or 33 gm granulated white sugar
  • Pinch of salt.
  • 1.5 large eggs or 2 small eggs.


  1. In a bowl sift all-purpose flour.  Now add active dry yeast & salt to 1 cup of sifted mixture and mix them well.
  2. Meanwhile, in a pan add milk, butter, and white sugar, and stir until butter melts.  (And let it cool enough to make sure it is lukewarm before adding to the mix.)
  3. Add the milk mixture to flour and knead well.
  4. Add eggs one at a time and keep kneading.
  5. Now start adding the remaining 1.5 cup flour and keep kneading until you find the dough is non-sticky and soft.  (Add slightly more flour if needed).
  6. On the other hand, grease a bowl and put the dough in it, covering it up with a greased plastic wrap.  Now let it rest for 1.5 to 2 hours, until the dough is almost doubled in size.

Now, for the Filling:

  • 1/3 cup (80 grams) packed light brown sugar
  • 2 tbsp all-purpose flour
  • 1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
  • 1/4 cup unsalted cold butter, (cut into pieces)

Mix all the ingredients in a bowl with hand, such that it looks like crumbs.

  1. Once the dough has almost doubled in size, just press it a bit to let the air out.
  2. Now roll it in a rectangular shape (anywhere between 12” X 6”) making sure the thickness is about a 1/4 to 1/2 inch.
  3. We have to make a log so spread the filling horizontally (long) and leave about 1/2 inch.
  4. Now start rolling the dough.  Keep it just right, not too tight nor too lose.  When you reach the end, use some egg to seal.
  5. Now divide the log in 8 sections.
  6. Put each section in the baking tray.
  7. Again, let it rest to raise.  Around an hour.
  8. Meanwhile, preheat oven at 190 °C.
  9. Now brush the rolls with light cream (just like egg wash).  And let them bake for around 25-30 mins.
  10. Once you see them turning light brown, you can check by inserting a toothpick in one of the buns and if it comes out clean, its done!
  11. Remove them from oven and again brush them with light cream.

For glaze

  • 1/4 cup icing sugar
  • 1 tablespoons light cream (or as required)

Mix them well and drizzle it over the buns!


That’s it, enjoy your fresh cinnamon rolls Smile

This was it…

This was it… This was the day that she started to focus again… For the hundredth time.  Yes.  It wasn’t the first time that she was focusing into her mind and heart.  She had done it a million times before, and for some reason it still felt like the first time.  Could she change?  Could she put a stop to it now?  Was it even possible for her to get it over and done with for the last time.  To just take a deep breath and identify herself for the final time, completely, with nothing more left to discover.  To just stick with what she wanted instead of letting go and repeating the same old story again and again.  Could it be the last time?  Could this be it?  WILL this be it?  She didn’t know.  She CANNOT know.  All she DOES know is that time will tell.  For now, all she CAN do is focus on herself, her dreams, her aspirations, her ambition, and stick to it.  Overcome any hurdle, and for once, not let the world, including the people she counts as her priority, not even let them interfere or become an obstacle between her and her dreams.  They say, do what your heart does, specially when your heart has wanted to do it ever since you can remember.  If despite the changes of environment, company, atmosphere, country, age, and people in life, if despite it all, your heart has desired something, do it!  Do it now!  Don’t waste time.  There can only be two outcomes to it.  Either success or failure.  You will finally know if your dream was worth it or not.  And if you’ve been holding back because you feel you aren’t worth it, then you already are prepared for the failing outcome, but maybe… just maybe… if you try, if you finally do it, you might actually succeed in it.  That’s what her heart whispered in that moment.  That’s what she needs to focus on.  That’s what she needs to do.  No one can ever tell her her dreams are immature, no one can tell her that.  Because those who have dreams, will value yours, and those who lack the ability to dream, they will always tell you your dreams are childish.  She had listened to them for years.  She wrote but never got feedback from the ones she loved because they didn’t even know she wrote, and the one she shared with, overlooked it as if it was rather useless thing.  But now was the time that she looked at those who did actually take time to read, who got inspired from it, and for them, with their help, she knew… This was it!  This was the day she decided to break from her shackled self.