Reignite or let it off?

And sometimes all you really need is a time out… open your diary of life… re-read the lessons it taught you, relive those moments and tell yourself, “If I could get through that, if this happened then, it can happen again & once again, I can get throught it now!”

Things will happen all through life, often times the repeat like a déjà vu… and sometimes to have a different ending than the last one, you need to go through the lessons again, revise them, and act on them!

That’s it!

Nothing is impossible.

And if you’ve been praying for God to reignite the flame then perhaps this is a sign… If you remember your lessons, you will know that this is when you can either cover the candle with your hands while HE reignites the flame or be ignorant and let it go off again…  choice is yours…

Believe in Karma?

I wait at the bus stop and a couple arrives, both old and shaking but yet they hold each other’s hands, giving the support needed.  My bus arrives and I get on it and as it takes me to my destination, I see many others like them; some with a companion & some alone…  My destination arrives, I start my job and with each passing hour, I see more old people.  Some of them fit as a fiddle, while others suffering from one disease or the other.  They are out to shop with shaky hands and weak legs, almost deaf or almost blind, some diabetics looking for sweets to change flavour of mouth while others who can barely hold or stand, look for something to cook for their guests…  all old, and all on their own.  Very few I find with a partner or a loved one…  and each single one reminds me of my parents… and my future that I fear…  not because old age is bad, but because the way our generations have gradually forgotten to treat old people with love, care, compassion… including many children have forgotten how to take care of their parents… this includes people from my generation…

So yes, I m scared of growing old when I see them.  And I know many people believe in Karma, that if you do good, you get good… and while I believe too, I am also realistic that sometimes bad happens to you not because you did bad, but because the bad doing was meant to be done by the other person while, being a Muslim, for me it was a chance to be patient to earn rewards…

For now, all I know is that when I see old people struggling, my heart bleeds… I pray Allah ease their troubles… Aameen…

Cinnamon Rolls



For the Dough:

  • 2.5 cups All-purpose flour / maida
  • 1 teaspoon active dry yeast…  (or half sachet i.e. 3.5 gm)
  • 1/2 cup milk (lukewarm)
  • 1/6 of a cup or 37.5 gm unsalted butter
  • 1/6 cup or 33 gm granulated white sugar
  • Pinch of salt.
  • 1.5 large eggs or 2 small eggs.


  1. In a bowl sift all-purpose flour.  Now add active dry yeast & salt to 1 cup of sifted mixture and mix them well.
  2. Meanwhile, in a pan add milk, butter, and white sugar, and stir until butter melts.  (And let it cool enough to make sure it is lukewarm before adding to the mix.)
  3. Add the milk mixture to flour and knead well.
  4. Add eggs one at a time and keep kneading.
  5. Now start adding the remaining 1.5 cup flour and keep kneading until you find the dough is non-sticky and soft.  (Add slightly more flour if needed).
  6. On the other hand, grease a bowl and put the dough in it, covering it up with a greased plastic wrap.  Now let it rest for 1.5 to 2 hours, until the dough is almost doubled in size.

Now, for the Filling:

  • 1/3 cup (80 grams) packed light brown sugar
  • 2 tbsp all-purpose flour
  • 1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
  • 1/4 cup unsalted cold butter, (cut into pieces)

Mix all the ingredients in a bowl with hand, such that it looks like crumbs.

  1. Once the dough has almost doubled in size, just press it a bit to let the air out.
  2. Now roll it in a rectangular shape (anywhere between 12” X 6”) making sure the thickness is about a 1/4 to 1/2 inch.
  3. We have to make a log so spread the filling horizontally (long) and leave about 1/2 inch.
  4. Now start rolling the dough.  Keep it just right, not too tight nor too lose.  When you reach the end, use some egg to seal.
  5. Now divide the log in 8 sections.
  6. Put each section in the baking tray.
  7. Again, let it rest to raise.  Around an hour.
  8. Meanwhile, preheat oven at 190 °C.
  9. Now brush the rolls with light cream (just like egg wash).  And let them bake for around 25-30 mins.
  10. Once you see them turning light brown, you can check by inserting a toothpick in one of the buns and if it comes out clean, its done!
  11. Remove them from oven and again brush them with light cream.

For glaze

  • 1/4 cup icing sugar
  • 1 tablespoons light cream (or as required)

Mix them well and drizzle it over the buns!


That’s it, enjoy your fresh cinnamon rolls Smile

This was it…

This was it… This was the day that she started to focus again… For the hundredth time.  Yes.  It wasn’t the first time that she was focusing into her mind and heart.  She had done it a million times before, and for some reason it still felt like the first time.  Could she change?  Could she put a stop to it now?  Was it even possible for her to get it over and done with for the last time.  To just take a deep breath and identify herself for the final time, completely, with nothing more left to discover.  To just stick with what she wanted instead of letting go and repeating the same old story again and again.  Could it be the last time?  Could this be it?  WILL this be it?  She didn’t know.  She CANNOT know.  All she DOES know is that time will tell.  For now, all she CAN do is focus on herself, her dreams, her aspirations, her ambition, and stick to it.  Overcome any hurdle, and for once, not let the world, including the people she counts as her priority, not even let them interfere or become an obstacle between her and her dreams.  They say, do what your heart does, specially when your heart has wanted to do it ever since you can remember.  If despite the changes of environment, company, atmosphere, country, age, and people in life, if despite it all, your heart has desired something, do it!  Do it now!  Don’t waste time.  There can only be two outcomes to it.  Either success or failure.  You will finally know if your dream was worth it or not.  And if you’ve been holding back because you feel you aren’t worth it, then you already are prepared for the failing outcome, but maybe… just maybe… if you try, if you finally do it, you might actually succeed in it.  That’s what her heart whispered in that moment.  That’s what she needs to focus on.  That’s what she needs to do.  No one can ever tell her her dreams are immature, no one can tell her that.  Because those who have dreams, will value yours, and those who lack the ability to dream, they will always tell you your dreams are childish.  She had listened to them for years.  She wrote but never got feedback from the ones she loved because they didn’t even know she wrote, and the one she shared with, overlooked it as if it was rather useless thing.  But now was the time that she looked at those who did actually take time to read, who got inspired from it, and for them, with their help, she knew… This was it!  This was the day she decided to break from her shackled self.

Safron Milk Treat


So in pardes I have craved tonnes of desi treats, including the ones which I may have barely had in my homeland too but I guess that was because I knew they were always available so didn’t really crave much whereas in London I doubt finding them, well at least not the same flavour or taste so that’s what got me into trying this milk treat that is known as Doodh ka sharbat or Doodh ki bottle in Pakistan… and while what I have made is not same as them, it pretty much satisfies the craving!!!

So all you need here is 4 pints Milk which is roughly 2.25 litres… 2 condensed milk cans (mine were 397g each) & since the milk here is processed so to bring the thickness n creamy touch, 2 double cream (mine were 284ml each) …  and safron of course, about a pinch!  Pistachio n almonds for garnishing…

Now start boiling the milk and when it is about to come to boil, add condensed milk and double cream, all the while stirring it well… meanwhile turn the heat to low… keep stirring until its creamy, now add safron, pistachio, & almonds.  Let it come to boil and then set aside and let it cool.  Tadaaaaa… your Safron Milk Treat is ready to drink!!

Serve chilled

P.S:  This recipe is totally richie rich, so you might want to reconsider if you are trying to lose weight!!!

Finding that center of gravity

Humans, at the same time, play multiple characters at once. They hold multiple positions at the same time… You can be oppressed & yet be the oppressor at once. And for that reason, I have learned that perhaps life is all about finding that balance, that center of gravity within yourself so that all your roles, duties are balanced, and none is suffering because of the other… Yet, we get so carried away, or perhaps at times, intimidated by a certain character of ourselves that we don’t realize how much others are suffering, and sometimes the ones suffering were in fact the ones that needed to be treasured more…

Congratulations, you are born, with a wail of cry you enter the world, you haven’t even opened your eyes yet and still you are entitled of so many positions in life, so many relations awaited for you to own them.  You are born, and you are a son/daughter, a sister/brother, a believer/nonbeliever, a niece/nephew, a grandson/granddaughter, and so on.  You haven’t learn to say a word, and perhaps you are even entitled as an uncle/aunt or perhaps granduncle/grandaunt.  Then as you grow, you keep adding to your titles, you keep adding your social circle, and your responsibilities.  It never stops, and continues until you die.

Today, I finally felt motivated to write about it while talking to a dear one.  I loved the gesture they did; they acted and took care of the responsibilities that one of their titles brought along them, and yet, one of their other relation suffered and they seemed completely oblivious to it.  It made me respect and yet disrespect them, both at once and I realized that is the case with all of us.  It includes me, you, them…  everyone!

You are either a believer or you are not, and this means that you either have an additional responsibility or not.  If you are a believer, then along with the worldly relations, you have to satisfy your Creator too and if you are not, then perhaps just focus on worldly relations.

Being a Muslim, at least for me, it all revolves around my religion, each of them holds their significance and makes me fulfill my certain duties towards them.  And yet, at times it is not easy.  In order to satisfy one relation, I end up being unjust to the other.  But what I have learned is that Islam makes it easy to balance them by telling us the priorities, and once we start balancing according to that list, it becomes comparatively easier to balance them, if not 100%.

However, if you are not a believer, then perhaps you can be unjust to either while being perfect for one of them.  But then, I have realized that eventually it makes you suffer more than the relation or the person on the other hand.  Because try as we might, we can never live with just one relation in world.  Even being an introvert makes you crave for relations, perhaps limited ones.

I don’t have any solution, but I do know that in order to have harmony in life, one does need to learn to balance relations.  Just because you got married, doesn’t mean your spouse is the only one who deserves your 100% dedication, and while it does to an extent, still it shouldn’t be on the expense of your duties towards your parents.  Or just because you are now blessed with a child, doesn’t mean you overlook your duties to your spouse.  And while you are balancing them all, doesn’t mean you completely ignore the friend who helped you through the ups and downs of life.  And while you are balancing them, don’t at all forget yourself, and your Creator (if you are a believer).

In the end, best of luck finding that balance, that harmony!  Because I still am trying to balance it all.